"Just chop it off..."

I figure it's important to note this current, unfortunate, common, expected and somewhat essential step in my journey-- my first injury. How I deal will determine my character and test my love for this sport.
Anyone I've ever trained with will tell you that I am made of rubber. "Armbar? Pffft forget it." Yeah I'm flexible and its been somewhat of a blessing but also a curse and I will explain why in this very long post of storytelling. I signed up for the Los Angeles International Open hoping to get at least two matches. I looked at the competitor list to find two other girls in my division and read "Jennifer Liou." Part of me went "fuck" and the other part of me rubbed my hands together while sporting a menacing grin. Rematch.
Flashback to my first tournament ever, the California Classic last November. My first match went well with an armbar from mount. That had me feeling awesome. My second match was Jenny. She stood out from the other girls competing not only because she wasn't wearing any make-up but also because she was entirely silent and had this look like either she was planning a murder or her participation that day was forced upon her. Or both. I wasn't exactly scared of her but you could tell she was already a very serious competitor. I went onto the mat and once the match started we were fighting for grips. I remembered a move that Romulo's friend visiting from Brazil, Jarrao had just taught me which involved passing my elbow over her extended arm that was gripping my lapel and shooting in for a single. It worked but after surviving her guillotine attempt, I somehow ended up with her on my back. She ended up choking me with my lapel but not before giving me gi burns on the bridge of my nose and hands and shoving her hand in my mouth while I attempted to avoid biting it. The girl was a beast and I compared her to a vengeful daughter out for my blood because I killed her Momma. Surely my first taste of a real competitor among many other firsts that day. I later watched her demolish her opponent in a nogi match with a triangle in less than a minute. Throughout the past year I had entered the same competitions as her but due to her being a featherweight, we never got matched up again.
So now back to this past Sunday, the LA Open, put on by the NABJJF, had only three weight classes for women and I was in the 140 and under division which would put Jenny in my bracket. NBD, (no big deal) I would TCB (take care of business.) I had a by and Jenny won the other girl at the last minute, literally. That girl went off and disappeared. She was eventually DQd and since I wouldn't be fighting the loser first, I'd be going in to fight for first. I had been getting my nerves down by joking around and making Jenny laugh. I was at ease, this would just be a fun match and no pressure. But this was also my rematch. I was mentally prepared considering I knew or at least knew that at white belt level, fighting Jenny is like fending off a rabid dog attack. I would soon find out that nothing had changed.
Normally I start my matches with a swift guard pull before my opponent can even remember what their game plan was but this time I waited and circled a bit. I thought, "fuck it," and swooped in. She immediately angled herself for a pass to my left so I planted my right foot on her torso and rolled her over for a sweep. Two points up. From then on she was attack attack attack and I unfortunately was left in defense mode. She got me in a guillotine while I was passing and my lovely teammate yelled for me to watch out for what I had already gotten into. Ha, good lookin' out! I popped my head out and from then on it was me trying to pin her legs together and pass and her going for triangles, omoplatas, guillotines and armbars. I sloppily (new word?) defended all of them until I was in her closed guard. Really didn't want to be there. I stupidly left my arm out. She tucked it under her armpit while attempting a triangle somewhat, wrapped her arm around mine placing her forearm below my elbow and pulled. Here's where I have the issue. Do I see how far she takes it? Do I wait til she gives up? Do i try to yank it out? Stand up? Oh wait that burns...this could do some damage. So I reluctantly tap. She stops, looks at the ref who doesn't motion anything and she goes again! I tap more this time and the match finally ends. I didn't hurt too much til I stepped off the mat. Then I felt it and curled up in a ball until the medic came over. It ached like a bitch and it hasn't stopped hurting since then despite the splint, ibuprofen, advil, darvocets and norcos I've been given. I had my friend jessi drive me to the er after waiting around, freaking out and indulging in Brazilian bbq. At this point theres no obvious break but possibly a hairline fracture in the radial head and I can't rotate my wrist. This is my first injury and I understand it's not my last but so far I'm losing my sanity and now my job. I'm learning to deal but not very well. I'll come back with a vengeance and perhaps be more prepared to fight for the kill. All part of the game, journey and lessons learned. I'll post pictures when I'm not in my phone.

don't..touch the boobies!!

I recently was approved to become a contributing writer for Suite101.com. I'm not sure how low the approval rate is or how high their standards are but apparently I met them by adding a link to this blog on my application. Suite101 is a freelance writing site that allows people to write basically whatever they want. I choose to write what I know and that's my experiences with BJJ. I know that articles on that site are used for answers to those seeking questions on search sites like google so I wrote my first article for a beginner or someone looking for advice on rolling with girls. What better topic to write about than that? Obviously a lot because I was beating a dead horse. BUT I haven't seen any published writing that was more subjective and whatnot. Sure, I wrote about what's already been said but I figured it was a great way to spread the exposure of BJJ and females to places on the intarwebz other than blogs and forums. My intentions were to write an article stating rebuttals to stupid things guys say regarding the issues they have with rolling with girls--mainly the reasons they don't at all. I originally wrote the subheaders as quotes of the excuses I have heard men make and those were "I'm going to hurt them," "I'm going to violate them" and "Losing to a girl is embarrassing." The editor wanted the headers to be more keyword friendly and make them more relevant to what the average person was going to type into the google search box. I changed it even though it made me sound like I was explaining how every guy makes these excuses and so I'm telling them how to deal with it. I wasn't agreeing that "touching the boobies" was an issue, I was trying to expose these "issues" as retarded and dismiss them altogether. So instead of people reading it and taking whatever applied to them into consideration, I was told that readers felt it was sexist, I was creating a problem that mostly didn't exist and that I sounded unknowledgeable and was asked for my "credentials." I'll blame the editor for changing the complete tone of my article but I thoroughly believe it's filled with some good insight. So read this, and take into consideration that no, not every guy is afraid of molesting a training partner and not every guy is going to have a fit about getting submitted by a lady (or they won't admit haha).
Let me know what you think: http://www.suite101.com/content/why-men-should-train-brazilian-jiu-jitsu-with-females-a295319

P.S. To support my lifestyle, I'm selling stuff I own.. soooooooo I'm just gonna leave this right here...you can take it or leave it...
http://shop.ebay.com/skabarbie101/m.html?_nkw=&_armrs=1&_from=&_ipg=25

Autumn Shmautumn

Today is the last official day of summer and in a few hours it will be fall. The season change can be noted by the temperature decreases at night, the shorter days and the dreadful traffic that congregates at any 5 mile radius of a school at 8 in the morning and 3pm in the afternoon. What does this have to do with jiu jitsu? Well usually this means that most of us students and those that use all their vacation days in the summer now have less time to train. There are days in the summer that I felt like training from 5 to well past sunset which would give me plenty of time to get some good work in but with the sun now going down much sooner than 8, it affects my drive to train. Instead of thinking about how many times I can roll and drill a technique, I'm thinking of the homework that's due tomorrow or the less and less amount of sleep I'm going to get before I wake up at the crack of dawn for work the next morning. This is no excuse to not train less or not as hard but it really is a change of pace. Goodbye to long summer days filled with jiu jitsu, beach then more jiu jitsu. Holler to 4 hour long classes, hours of studying, the stress of rushing to training from work and or fitting the class jiu jitsu schedule into yours. /Sigh. On a lighter note, American Nationals are this weekend at Cal State Dominguez Hills in Carson. This will be my first IBJJF competition at blue belt and with 18 girls so far in the absolute division I am so excited. I'm semi-shitting my pants since I've never been in a division that large and I've probably been training less than most of the girls in it but I'm stoked to play my guard. ALSO, speaking of guard, I'm currently working on a zine called Pulling Guard. It's a small DIY magazine. Small meaning about 6 pages and the size of a half sheet of letter paper. It will be xeroxed at a kinkos and handed out at competitions around here with the option of donation. I'm really really excited to get into production with interviews, articles, polls, cute fonts, techniques, product reviews and important information and insight pertaining to today's sport jiu jitsu world. As a sneak peak it will include Romulo Barral (shocker) and a little piece on my friend, coach and new brown belt Benny Dariush. If interested in getting a copy please let me know!

Why didn't I think of this?

I recently read on Sherdog, Hillary's facebook page and a post about a contest based on a project started by Hillary Williams. Just to give you a little insight, when I started jiu jitsu I was posting on a music messageboard that I am a member of (don't judge me) and there is an ongoing thread for jiu jitsu pracitioners. It's a small group and everyone "knows" everyone and so when this username "hillary" started posting, it was made known that she was THEE Hillary Williams. I had no idea who she was and I looked her up. A big competitor and an up and coming female grappler who was already making waves. She had learned Portuguese while also in premed school. She had traveled to Brazil and accomplished so much even as a purple belt. Anyway, she had a lot of great advice to add in our little forum before she stopped posting. I messaged her about being nervous for my first competition back in November and she calmed me down with a cool reply telling me that she still gets nervous and I deserve to be there cause I trained my ass off. Anyway, now a black belt she has made hugeeeeeeee fuckin strides in our sport and here she is again with a great idea. Give her your gis.....so she can send them to the slums in Brazil DUH where kids don't even have gis yet the love for jiu jitsu is very much alive and well in their eyes. So here's her post and I hope it inspires you to send the starter gi you have stored away somewhere.
"On every Jiu Jitsu forum I've been on, once every other month (or so) a thread pops up with "how many gis do you have?" People (myself, unfortunately, included) boast about having 8, 10, and 12 gis. Twelve gis? Really? I train hours and hours a week, but let's be honest. I probably don't need more than four gis, much less 12.

One of the greatest experiences I had on my last Brazil trip was the seminar I taught at a projeto social (community service) gym. We didn't have great mats to roll on, some of the students didn't have gis, and we weren't even indoors--but it was probably my favorite seminar I've taught so far. The students were so enthralled that I came out there just to teach them, and I've never felt like Jiu Jitsu was appreciated as much as it was with those students. For the few hours we were on the mats, no one cared about time, money, problems at home, or anything else. We just did Jiu Jitsu until it was too dark to see.

I was talking to Finfou (Alan do Nascimento) about his projeto in Brazil, in the Cantagalo slum. I met a few students back and forth through Checkmat in Copacabana, but the majority stay in Cantagalo. He told me the students are so dedicated, so hungry to learn, but so many don't train because they don't even have gis.

That's where you come in. I'm not asking you to buy a new gi and ship it out, I'm not asking you to donate your Shoyoroll #7, I'm just asking you to reach out. We all have a "starter gi," and you know what I'm talking about. That gi you used as a white belt and developed a different fashion taste, that gi that shrunk too much in the dryer or the gi that just didn't fit you right, the gi your son grew out of when he turned eight. If you can't donate a gi (understandable), PLEASE talk to your gym, the parents of the kid's programs, or someone you know who might. To you, it means so little. To someone in the projeto, it could mean so much.

I need adult and kid (lots of kids!) gis, hand-me-downs in good condition are absolutely great. My goal is 30-50 gis, and I plan to take them to Brazil with me the next time I go down. If the deal breaker is having to pay the shipping to my gym, well, I'll pay! As well, I hope by now I've earned a reputation of not being someone who would turn around and sell your gis.

I realize this is just one of many projetos, and I realize the task is too grand to be able to get a gi to everyone who is needing them. I hope to help as many as I can and encourage others to do so. Every single person makes a difference. Every single gi will make the life of someone better.

If you'd like to donate, please send your gi to:

Westside MMA RE: Projeto Cantagalo
1021 Jessie Road, Suite N
Little Rock, AR 72202

We write daily about how much Jiu Jitsu has given to us, shouldn't we try to give back?"

"< start rant >"

The importance of training outside of class. Here is a topic that most people don't think about perhaps because they don't need to-- its always available. For some, the idea of having a mat space to work with a training partner on a move, a position, a submission, whatever. On your own time. At your own pace. With the ability to ask questions, experiment and drill is non-existent. GB Encino is no longer my gym due to Romulo leaving. I've been able to train elsewhere with him and although not as strict as the Encino gym, I don't have the freedom to train on any schedule other than what has been created for us. There was open mat, sure but it was rolling that was usually with assigned partners and there wasn't any real time for what I have experienced at other places. I believe the importance of training at your own pace sometimes is passed on so many times. When in school, say a math class, you learn the lesson for the day and you go home and do your homework. Jiu jitsu is full of lessons and techniques to memorize but you can't really do it on your own. You need two to tango, I mean roll. And so you go home and unless you have mats and a roommate who trains as well, you can't go over what you learned. Yes there is live rolling, open mat, and more classes to get that technique real sunk into your brain but how about some mat space and a training partner to drill it, try it with different resistance levels and really adding it into your game? I know I'm not the only one who likes to stop mid-roll and say "what the hell do I do here" or "did that sweep really get you" or "how deep was that choke?" so in order to stop annoying those who want to use sparring time for well, sparring, I'd enjoy a little time with someone to do what I want. We're not all the same, we don't all learn the same, we don't all roll the same, train the same, adapt the same or think the same. /end rant.

P.S. I had my birthday and my mom and sister both love baking so they made me a homemade jiu jitsu ice cream birthday cake. I thought I'd share!

Worst of the West? Clever?

So I'm not much of a complainer but....... ha, okay okay I'm kidding. I'm usually the first to speak my mind about an issue I'm having a hard time tolerating. Ex: "OMG this line is taking forever" or "WHAT THE #$@% ARE YOU DOING!?" while driving. I do complain but I don't make excuses. Last weekend was the Best of the West competition in Anaheim, CA. Another tourney, the NABJJ American something-or-other, was happening in Torrance at the same time and I chose the Anaheim one (even though it's much farther from my house) because my teammate said it was better and I had also heard good things about it. Normally a no-gi only competition, this was the first year they added gi and having only been a blue belt for a week I figured I'd test my skills at a smaller competition. Weigh ins were at OTM and even though an OTM had opened up in the valley right near me, they weren't participating and I had to drive in 405 traffic to get to the redondo location. Apparently we were going to be getting a shirt and mouthguard free at the weigh ins since we were getting it taken care of ahead of time but that wasn't the case. I paid the extra $20 bucks to add no-gi since I decided last minute to enter it and we were on our way home. Next day I got there and it was stuffy as a purgatory. They had cancelled the MMA convention that was going to be happening at the same time and the competition was moved from the Anaheim Convention Center to a small high school gym. They were running late and that was expected. Finally I was called at around 4 when women's was expected to start at 3. Anyway, I go to the mat and check in with them. 5 minutes later they're calling my name over the PA and I went over and clarified that I had been standing there the whole time. "Oh, duh!" the guy said after admitting he was an idiot, pretty much. Don't consider me harsh right now because after I go into more detail you'll fully understand. They start the first match and I notice it's only five minutes so I tell them it's six minutes for blue belt. He ASKS the girls before they start the match if they want it at six and they give him a weird look and say yes. The first match was the two other girls in my bracket and I was the by. Amanda wins over Jill and I'm up next. They try to hand me the red belt when Jill is wearing a black gi and I'm wearing a white gi. I push his hand back and tell him there's no need for it. I make sure it's six minutes and start the match with Jill and won with a cross choke from guard. I go to check the bracket to make sure they get my name right. Turns out I was meant to fight Amanda since she won the first match and Jill was the loser. I guess that works out in the end so I have more matches. I have a break while two other girls fight. Turns out the only weight division that existed was the one I was placed in which was heavier than I would normally fight. The other girls were only able to fight in the open? and the guys that were putting together the bracket put it as the two lightest girls on one side. Kristen won that side. I have my match with Amanda after again having to tell them it's 6 minutes and again having to deny the red belt and lose on points. I get second and they don't have anymore third place medals so Jill gets a second place medal as well. Doesn't concern me, I know, but I'm complaining about how the tournament was being run, remember? So the way the two guys made the open bracket was that I had to fight Hannah who hadn't fought yet. I had just gone so I needed a break. Within that 5 minute resting time Hannah's dad in the stands got up and starts yelling about how his daughter hadn't even fought yet. He then throws the gold medal they gave her since she didn't get put in a weight division and it hits some random guy in the back. Some brazilian dude who was coaching for other people was helping out with the bracket since the guys working the tournament couldn't figure it out. Hannah leaves since her dad was pissed about waiting and the guy running the whole tournament comes over and snatches the bracket out of the Brazilian guy's hands and says "No no no, no one touches the bracket but my staff" and his staff even admits they had no idea what they were doing so they handed it to someone who knew. The brazilian man figures that with whoever was left for the open I would have to fight Amanda again or the girl that Kristen won for third. Only third. My friend Benny stepped in to say that since Amanda and I fought in the final, we should be on separate sides of the bracket. Mr. tournament manager says he's been doing this for 13 years and that's totally not the case. I left considering it was a bunch of idiots yelling at each other and I probably wasn't going to get a fight anyway. Second day I really was considering not coming back but I did because my teammate Edwin was fighting no-gi as well and I was nice enough to carpool with him and drive since he just got his license and would have had to drive 40 miles. He was DQ'd in the final for having a straight ankle lock that I guess was about to turn into a knee bar cause the kid turned funny reacting to the foot lock. Funny that he had done the same thing on the same guy a day earlier in the gi. I also overheard a guy asking a ref about whether such and such was an illegal move and he responded "it depends on the ref, some yes some no." I don't know if that is standard at tournaments but aren't all referees briefed before the tournament to ref the same and have the same standard across the board? Guess not. Anyway, my no-gi matches were two hours late this time (whatever, it happens) Well when they had us in the bullpen some guy basically announced that they messed up our brackets and that they were redoing them as he spoke and the next competition we could enter for free. My bracket was set and I was again the lightest one. First match I got a triangle. Second match was against I am not kidding you, Sasquatch. I admit I messed around a lot and didn't get right to business but I felt like I was fighting a large creature. She neck cranked me and even though it's in the rules as a DQ the ref didn't do anything. She was squashing me, rolling around like a whale trying to pass my guard, pulling my arms and legs every which way, powering through every submission I attempted and rolled me into a ball and I'm pretty sure if a suitcase was nearby she'd be stuffing me into it. I wasn't sure whether I wanted to laugh my ass off or cry really hard while watching the video after. The second place medal I got for that bracket was completely different than the medal I had gotten on Saturday. In fact, it read "US OPEN." They had run out of medals and started handing out whatever they had up their you-know-whats. So it was run by incompetent people and to add some more complaining, there was a rule made that only one coach could be up against the barriers. One very impatient rude woman was in charge of monitoring the barrier and making people sit down. Edwin was about to go up and she asked whether I was coaching. I said no not yet and she said for me to sit down so I did. When I was coaching Edwin and taping his match he had the DQ and I made sure to film it even after the match was technically over just in case there were some misunderstandings that could be settled with proof of video. Angry rude lady then yells at me to sit down. After I said I was coaching she continued to question me asking for my wristband, who I was coaching blah blah blah. Throughout the day she was a nazi and pestering coaches-- not a very pleasant addition to the already frustrating process of the day. So I came out of it with two entirely different medals after winning my first blue belt match ever and my first no-gi match ever and a lotttttttttttt of huffing and puffing. Pictures and video of a rare sighting of big foot:

Highlight I made on the Flip cam program!